要学会认输双语美文

时间:2022-10-01 07:34:59 经典美文 收藏本文 下载本文

要学会认输双语美文(合集6篇)由网友“霍麻辣不吃辣”投稿提供,下面是小编帮大家整理后的要学会认输双语美文,希望对大家的学习与工作有所帮助。

要学会认输双语美文

篇1:要学会认输双语美文

要学会认输双语美文

To Win at Marriage, Learn to lose

赢得美满婚姻,要学会认输

[1]Having been married for more than 40 years, I can attest to the truth of the following statement: to excel in the art of domestic argument, one must master the art of losing.

[1]做为一个结婚40余年的人,我可以证明下面这个说法完全正确:想要在家庭争执中得满分,首先要掌握认输的艺术。

[2]Modern psychologists are taken with the “win-win” solution. But in marriage, success resides more in “lose-lose” solutions. Out of these, both parties can win. For in the love configuration, losing gives a gift that always returns.

[2]现代心理学家们都醉心于“一赢再赢”的解决办法,而在婚姻里头,成功往往在于采取“一输再输”的策略。因为这样,双方都可以是赢家。在爱情的天地里,认输实际上永远是一份有回报的礼物。

[3]One day shortly after my wife and I were married, we set about picking new living-room wallpaper from a book of samples. My taste and hers were at odds.

[3]婚后不久的一天,我和妻子着手从一本样品手册中挑选起居室的壁纸。我们的爱好有了矛盾。

[4]“I like this one,” she said. “That looks like a section of a diseased liver.” “How can you say that? This is a classical pattern that goes all the way back to the Venetian.” “The Venetian were blind. They named blinds after them, remember? I like this one.” “I wouldn’t hang that in hell if I were the devil.”

[4]“我喜欢这一张。” “这张简直就像一块有病的猪肝。” “你怎么能这样说?这可是一幅古典的古威尼斯风格的图案。” “威尼斯人都瞎眼了,后来的瞎子也都是因威尼斯人得名,记得吗?我喜欢这一张。” “我死也不会挂那一张的。”

[5]As the argument went on, my wife suddenly slammed the book shut. “There are over two hundred samples in this book,” she declared. “I say we spend our energy finding one that suits us both, instead of bickering over the ones we don’t like.”

[5]在争吵中,我妻子突然用力把书一合,大声说:“这本书中有200张样品,我们应该把精力用在找到一张我们都喜欢的样品,而不是用来争吵那些我们不喜欢的。”

[6]And that’s how we settled it. Eventually we found a pattern we both liked. The “wallpaper book” became our symbol for settling the myriad issues that arise in marriage. “Well,” she’d say when we couldn’t agree on furniture or a place to vacation, “there are plenty of samples in the wallpaper book.”

[6]我们就这样解决了争执。最后我们终于找到了一个我们共同喜欢的图案。壁纸样品手册成了我们解决婚姻中遇到的无数争执的一个象征。当我们在要什么家具或去什么地方休假的意见不一时,我的妻子就说:“在壁纸样品手册里有的是样品呢!”

7]The issues that people argue over most in marriage, such as how to spend money, often aren’t the real ones. The key issue is: who is going to be in control? When I was younger, my need to control arose out of fear, a lack of trust, insecurity. The day I finally realized I didn’t need to control my wife—that, indeed, I ought not control her, that I couldn’t control her, and that if I tried to, I would destroy our marriage—was the day our marriage began.

[7]人们在婚姻中争吵的那些事情诸如怎样花钱之类,往往并不是争执的真正所在。争执的关键是谁来控制。当我年青的时候,我想去控制是因为出于恐惧,是缺乏信任和安全感。当我终于认识到我不必控制我的妻子的时候,我们的婚姻才算真正开始。确实,我不应该控制我的妻子,我也不能去控制她,如果我要这样去做,我就会毁坏我们的婚姻。

[8]Giving up control is often confused with weakness. But the winner in a domestic argument is never really the winner. When you win a battle and your partner submits, you have, paradoxically, lost.

[8]放弃控制对方常常与软弱相混淆。其实家庭内争吵的赢家永远不可能是真正的赢家。当你赢得了一场口角,使你的另一半屈服了,你其实恰恰相反,是输家了。

[9]What is it we want most from a marriage? To love and be loved. To be happy and secure. To grow, to discover. A love relationship is the garden in which we plant, cultivate and harvest the most precious of crops, our own self, and in which our spouse is provided the same rich soil in which to bloom.

[9]我们在婚姻中最想得到的是什么?是爱与被爱,是幸福与安定,是不断的成长与发现。爱情的关系就是一个花园,在这个花园里我们种植、培养和收获最宝贵的庄稼,这就是我们自己;在这个花园里,我们要给我们的爱人提供同样肥沃的土壤,让她茁壮成长。

[10]We cannot obtain what we want unless our partner also gets what he or she wants. A woman may, for instance, want to go to the symphony. Her husband might hate symphonies. But by spending a few hours listening to music he doesn’t care for, he can bring joy to his partner. That’s a pretty cheap price to pay for joy, isn’t it?

[10]我们不可能得到自己想要的东西,除非我们的配偶得到他(或她)想要的。例如:一个女人想去听一场交响乐,而她的丈夫却讨厌交响乐,只要丈夫宁愿花几个小时去听一下他不喜欢的音乐,就可以给他的配偶带来快乐,难道这不是一个很廉价的换取快乐的办法吗?

[11]But what if a husband wants to go on a fishing trip with friends? Suddenly there aren’t a lot of samples in the wallpaper book: his wife either agrees or not.

[11]但是如果丈夫想要和他的朋友们一起去钓鱼呢?这时妻子就面临同意或不同意的抉择,就像墙纸样手册中突然没有许多样纸可供挑选了。

[12]Already you can hear the usual power strategies: “I’ll spend my money any way I please,” or “How come you’re such a millstone? Jim’s wife is happy that he gets to go.”

[12]你也许已听说过这样的权力策略:“我可以随意花我自己的钱。”或:“你怎么这样麻烦?吉姆的妻子就高兴他随便去哪儿。”

[13]Instead of such strategies, he might try empowering his partner: “Honey, I’d like to go on a fishing trip with the boys. What do you think?” “I thought we were going away.” “How about this fall? I’ve always wanted to take a trip with you to see the fall foliage in New England.” “Good idea. I’ll go see my mother while you’re fishing.” Such a dialogue, as idealistic as it sounds, is born of a marriage of mature adults.

[13]不采用这种办法,丈夫可以把事情让妻子自己决定:“亲爱的,我想和小伙子们一块去钓鱼,你看怎样?” “我想还是我们一块出去吧。” “今年秋天再去怎样?我一直想跟你去新英格兰看一看秋天的落叶。” “好吧。你去钓鱼而我回家看母亲。” 这样的对话,听起来是最理想的了。它只能发生在很成熟的成年人配偶之间。

[14]But what if she says, “You always make promises you never keep. This fall there will be some excuse. I think you owe me a trip first”? Now he must decide. Is she right? She could be, you know. When the couple arrives at this juncture, it’s time for him to listen.

[14]但如果妻子说:“你从不信守诺言。到今年秋天你又会有别的借口。我想是你首先欠我一次出游,对吧?”这样丈夫就必须决定,他的妻子是否正确。要知道,他的妻子可能是正确的。当双方到了这样一个关键时刻,丈夫就应该听从了。

[15]When anger is hurled at us, it hurts us. If it were a pistol, I would insist anger, like control, be checked at the door. But anger can also be a response to pain. So when your spouse responds in anger, you must terminate the argument. It’s that simple: the argument must end because another person may be in pain.

[15]如果激愤在我们之间爆发,它会伤害我们的感情。如果激愤是一把手枪,我认为也要像对待控制他人的欲望一样,要在一开始就不让它发射出来。但是愤怒可以是内心伤痛的一种释放。当你的配偶释放愤怒的时候,你就必须停止争吵。道理很简单,争吵必须终止,因为其中一人可能已被触动内心的痛处。

[16]Try this: Let a little space occur between you. Let the storm recede a little. Then tell your partner you understand that when a person is angry, it means she’s been hurt, and that you want to do something about it because you love her.

[16]不妨这样试一下:让你们之间的紧张松弛一下,让你们之间的风暴平息一点。告诉你的妻子你理解她的激愤,你知道她内心有伤痛,你愿意为此做点什么,因为你爱她。

[17]Perhaps she’ll tell you why she’s hurt—angrily. Try not to be put off, but to hear the anger as sounds of hurt. When you discover the pain, you can address its cause, and the anger will begin to fade.

[17]也许她会愤怒地告诉你她为什么受伤,不要拖延,只管倾听她激愤的表达。当你发现她的痛处是什么时,你可以说出它的原因,这样激愤就可以平抚。

[18]You’re allowed to get angry too. But dumping anger on your partner is a poor way to soothe your hurt. When you talk of your hurt without anger, an unangry response usually comes.

[18]你自己也可以表示愤怒,但是对你的配偶宣泄你的激愤不是一个抚平内心伤痛的好办法。你如心平气和地说出你的隐伤,你会得到心平气和的理解。

[19] So remember: If you want to overcome anger in your relationship, search for the hurt. If you want to feel loved and respected, give up control. And if you want to win arguments at home, learn to lose them.

[19]所以请记住:如果你要想在你们的关系中克服激愤,那么就要找出内心的伤痛;如果你要想得到爱和尊重,就必须放弃对伴侣的控制;如果你想要赢得家中的口角,就先学会认输吧!

扩展:公交票务词汇

票务 ticket business

票价 fare

基本票价 basic fare(乘用公共交通工具起始收费金额)

全程票价 full fare

月票 monthly ticket

市区月票 city monthly ticket(市区线路上使用的月票)

郊区月票 suburban1 monthly ticket(郊区线路上使用的月票)

专线月票 one-line monthly ticket(只适用于一条线路的月票)

学生月票 student monthly ticket

通用月票 general monthly ticket(在市区及郊区线路或多种交通方式中均可使用的月票)

公用月票 service monthly ticket(单位购买供内部职工为公务使用的月票)

计程票制 metered fare

分段票制 sectional fare

计时票制 time fare system(按租用车辆的时间计算票价的方法)

单一票制 flat fare(不论乘行里程远近,票价均相同的计算票价的方法)

票类 fare ticket type(按照公共交通票证的使用范围和期限而划分的类别。如普通票、月票等)

票价里程 fare-kilometre(票额规定的最大乘行里程)

车票 ticket

普通票,零票 cash fare(乘客乘行时付现金购买的车票)

往返票 round-trip ticket(在一条线路上,去程和回程可各使用一次的车票)

磁性车票 magnetic ticket(票面上有磁性物质在自动检票机上使用的车票)

代用币 token(代替车船票面值的一种硬质品)

免费乘车 zero fare(按合法规定无需付款乘用公共交通工具的行为)

查票 ticket checking

补票 compensation fare

罚票 penalty fare

车票有效期 ticket validity time

篇2:赢得美满婚姻要学会认输双语美文欣赏

赢得美满婚姻要学会认输双语美文欣赏

[1]Having been married for more than 40 years, I can attest to the truth of the following statement: to excel in the art of domestic argument, one must master the art of losing.

[1]做为一个结婚40余年的人,我可以证明下面这个说法完全正确:想要在家庭争执中得满分,首先要掌握认输的艺术。

[2]Modern psychologists are taken with the “win-win” solution. But in marriage, success resides more in “lose-lose” solutions. Out of these, both parties can win. For in the love configuration, losing gives a gift that always returns.

[2]现代心理学家们都醉心于“一赢再赢”的解决办法,而在婚姻里头,成功往往在于采取“一输再输”的策略。因为这样,双方都可以是赢家。在爱情的天地里,认输实际上永远是一份有回报的礼物。

[3]One day shortly after my wife and I were married, we set about picking new living-room wallpaper from a book of samples. My taste and hers were at odds.

[3]婚后不久的一天,我和妻子着手从一本样品手册中挑选起居室的壁纸。我们的爱好有了矛盾。

[4]“I like this one,” she said. “That looks like a section of a diseased liver.” “How can you say that? This is a classical pattern that goes all the way back to the Venetian.” “The Venetian were blind. They named blinds after them, remember? I like this one.” “I wouldn’t hang that in hell if I were the devil.”

[4]“我喜欢这一张。” “这张简直就像一块有病的猪肝。” “你怎么能这样说?这可是一幅古典的古威尼斯风格的图案。” “威尼斯人都瞎眼了,后来的瞎子也都是因威尼斯人得名,记得吗?我喜欢这一张。” “我死也不会挂那一张的。”

[5]As the argument went on, my wife suddenly slammed the book shut. “There are over two hundred samples in this book,” she declared. “I say we spend our energy finding one that suits us both, instead of bickering over the ones we don’t like.”

[5]在争吵中,我妻子突然用力把书一合,大声说:“这本书中有200张样品,我们应该把精力用在找到一张我们都喜欢的样品,而不是用来争吵那些我们不喜欢的。”

[6]And that’s how we settled it. Eventually we found a pattern we both liked. The “wallpaper book” became our symbol for settling the myriad issues that arise in marriage. “Well,” she’d say when we couldn’t agree on furniture or a place to vacation, “there are plenty of samples in the wallpaper book.”

[6]我们就这样解决了争执。最后我们终于找到了一个我们共同喜欢的图案。壁纸样品手册成了我们解决婚姻中遇到的无数争执的一个象征。当我们在要什么家具或去什么地方休假的意见不一时,我的妻子就说:“在壁纸样品手册里有的`是样品呢!”

7]The issues that people argue over most in marriage, such as how to spend money, often aren’t the real ones. The key issue is: who is going to be in control? When I was younger, my need to control arose out of fear, a lack of trust, insecurity. The day I finally realized I didn’t need to control my wife—that, indeed, I ought not control her, that I couldn’t control her, and that if I tried to, I would destroy our marriage—was the day our marriage began.

[7]人们在婚姻中争吵的那些事情诸如怎样花钱之类,往往并不是争执的真正所在。争执的关键是谁来控制。当我年青的时候,我想去控制是因为出于恐惧,是缺乏信任和安全感。当我终于认识到我不必控制我的妻子的时候,我们的婚姻才算真正开始。确实,我不应该控制我的妻子,我也不能去控制她,如果我要这样去做,我就会毁坏我们的婚姻。

[8]Giving up control is often confused with weakness. But the winner in a domestic argument is never really the winner. When you win a battle and your partner submits, you have, paradoxically, lost.

[8]放弃控制对方常常与软弱相混淆。其实家庭内争吵的赢家永远不可能是真正的赢家。当你赢得了一场口角,使你的另一半屈服了,你其实恰恰相反,是输家了。

[9]What is it we want most from a marriage? To love and be loved. To be happy and secure. To grow, to discover. A love relationship is the garden in which we plant, cultivate and harvest the most precious of crops, our own self, and in which our spouse is provided the same rich soil in which to bloom.

[9]我们在婚姻中最想得到的是什么?是爱与被爱,是幸福与安定,是不断的成长与发现。爱情的关系就是一个花园,在这个花园里我们种植、培养和收获最宝贵的庄稼,这就是我们自己;在这个花园里,我们要给我们的爱人提供同样肥沃的土壤,让她茁壮成长。

[10]We cannot obtain what we want unless our partner also gets what he or she wants. A woman may, for instance, want to go to the symphony. Her husband might hate symphonies. But by spending a few hours listening to music he doesn’t care for, he can bring joy to his partner. That’s a pretty cheap price to pay for joy, isn’t it?

[10]我们不可能得到自己想要的东西,除非我们的配偶得到他(或她)想要的。例如:一个女人想去听一场交响乐,而她的丈夫却讨厌交响乐,只要丈夫宁愿花几个小时去听一下他不喜欢的音乐,就可以给他的配偶带来快乐,难道这不是一个很廉价的换取快乐的办法吗?

[11]But what if a husband wants to go on a fishing trip with friends? Suddenly there aren’t a lot of samples in the wallpaper book: his wife either agrees or not.

[11]但是如果丈夫想要和他的朋友们一起去钓鱼呢?这时妻子就面临同意或不同意的抉择,就像墙纸样手册中突然没有许多样纸可供挑选了。

[12]Already you can hear the usual power strategies: “I’ll spend my money any way I please,” or “How come you’re such a millstone? Jim’s wife is happy that he gets to go.”

[12]你也许已听说过这样的权力策略:“我可以随意花我自己的钱。”或:“你怎么这样麻烦?吉姆的妻子就高兴他随便去哪儿。”

[13]Instead of such strategies, he might try empowering his partner: “Honey, I’d like to go on a fishing trip with the boys. What do you think?” “I thought we were going away.” “How about this fall? I’ve always wanted to take a trip with you to see the fall foliage in New England.” “Good idea. I’ll go see my mother while you’re fishing.” Such a dialogue, as idealistic as it sounds, is born of a marriage of mature adults.

[13]不采用这种办法,丈夫可以把事情让妻子自己决定:“亲爱的,我想和小伙子们一块去钓鱼,你看怎样?” “我想还是我们一块出去吧。” “今年秋天再去怎样?我一直想跟你去新英格兰看一看秋天的落叶。” “好吧。你去钓鱼而我回家看母亲。” 这样的对话,听起来是最理想的了。它只能发生在很成熟的成年人配偶之间。

[14]But what if she says, “You always make promises you never keep. This fall there will be some excuse. I think you owe me a trip first”? Now he must decide. Is she right? She could be, you know. When the couple arrives at this juncture, it’s time for him to listen.

[14]但如果妻子说:“你从不信守诺言。到今年秋天你又会有别的借口。我想是你首先欠我一次出游,对吧?”这样丈夫就必须决定,他的妻子是否正确。要知道,他的妻子可能是正确的。当双方到了这样一个关键时刻,丈夫就应该听从了。

[15]When anger is hurled at us, it hurts us. If it were a pistol, I would insist anger, like control, be checked at the door. But anger can also be a response to pain. So when your spouse responds in anger, you must terminate the argument. It’s that simple: the argument must end because another person may be in pain.

[15]如果激愤在我们之间爆发,它会伤害我们的感情。如果激愤是一把手枪,我认为也要像对待控制他人的欲望一样,要在一开始就不让它发射出来。但是愤怒可以是内心伤痛的一种释放。当你的配偶释放愤怒的时候,你就必须停止争吵。道理很简单,争吵必须终止,因为其中一人可能已被触动内心的痛处。

[16]Try this: Let a little space occur between you. Let the storm recede a little. Then tell your partner you understand that when a person is angry, it means she’s been hurt, and that you want to do something about it because you love her.

[16]不妨这样试一下:让你们之间的紧张松弛一下,让你们之间的风暴平息一点。告诉你的妻子你理解她的激愤,你知道她内心有伤痛,你愿意为此做点什么,因为你爱她。

[17]Perhaps she’ll tell you why she’s hurt—angrily. Try not to be put off, but to hear the anger as sounds of hurt. When you discover the pain, you can address its cause, and the anger will begin to fade.

[17]也许她会愤怒地告诉你她为什么受伤,不要拖延,只管倾听她激愤的表达。当你发现她的痛处是什么时,你可以说出它的原因,这样激愤就可以平抚。

[18]You’re allowed to get angry too. But dumping anger on your partner is a poor way to soothe your hurt. When you talk of your hurt without anger, an unangry response usually comes.

[18]你自己也可以表示愤怒,但是对你的配偶宣泄你的激愤不是一个抚平内心伤痛的好办法。你如心平气和地说出你的隐伤,你会得到心平气和的理解。

[19] So remember: If you want to overcome anger in your relationship, search for the hurt. If you want to feel loved and respected, give up control. And if you want to win arguments at home, learn to lose them.

[19]所以请记住:如果你要想在你们的关系中克服激愤,那么就要找出内心的伤痛;如果你要想得到爱和尊重,就必须放弃对伴侣的控制;如果你想要赢得家中的口角,就先学会认输吧!

篇3:学会认输优秀美文

学会认输优秀美文

同学聚会,免不了摆棋厮杀。几盘棋下来,输者情绪沮丧,赢者意得志满。本是游戏,输棋者就是不认输,还急眼埋怨观棋者胡乱支招,僵持不下,几句话就闹得半红脸,陈芝麻烂谷子便翻腾出来,本来是一次快乐的聚会,最终闹个不欢而散。其实,想起来不就是一盘棋嘛,输了又能怎么样呢?

看看身边的事儿,经商的小贩为了占领市场,挖空心思想出各种办法打垮对方,结果往往是两败俱伤;多年的邻居,为芝麻豆大的小事儿,各执一词谁也不想服输,结果往往是老死不相往来,延续着自扫门前雪的'“古训”;夫妻间常为生活琐事儿争执,谁也不肯服输,结果往往是劳燕纷飞。凡事固执地坚持着赢,殊不知为此将会付出多大的代价。认输,在人的心目中貌似投降,其实认输在生命的轮回中是前进,是赢。

认输,是一种最合理、最积极的做法。短暂的认输能够清醒地认识对方的长处,公正地看到自己的短处,并能为自己找到一条取长补短的最佳途径。退一步海阔天空,更能让自己摆正心态,把握前行的步履,慢慢就会发现,成功就在前方。

认输,是给自己一条生路。面对现实能够认输,在一定程度上来说也是在为自己保存着再生的实力,为尽快东山再起创造条件。

认输,对每个人来说就是一种反向刺激。智者的认输,会让对手认为你已经一败涂地、不堪一击,就会趾高气扬。不远的将来,就会收到“明修栈道,暗渡陈仓”的效果。对自己来说,也会激发自己卧薪尝胆,坚忍不拔的勇气与力量。

诚然,每个人都希望自己赢,更不应该随随便便地认输。只有在竭尽全力无法赢的时候,拥有认输的勇气,才是人生中认输的真正内涵。认输是风雨跋涉中停歇的驿站;认输是生命轮回岁月里勇往直前的步履。

篇4:赢得美满婚姻,要学会认输

To Win at Marriage, Learn to lose

赢得美满婚姻,要学会认输

[1]Having been married for more than 40 years, I can attest to the truth of the following statement: to excel in the art of domestic argument, one must master the art of losing.

[1]做为一个结婚40余年的人,我可以证明下面这个说法完全正确:想要在家庭争执中得满分,首先要掌握认输的艺术。

[2]Modern psychologists are taken with the “win-win” solution. But in marriage, success resides more in “lose-lose” solutions. Out of these, both parties can win. For in the love configuration, losing gives a gift that always returns.

[2]现代心理学家们都醉心于“一赢再赢”的解决办法,而在婚姻里头,成功往往在于采取“一输再输”的策略。因为这样,双方都可以是赢家。在爱情的天地里,认输实际上永远是一份有回报的礼物。

[3]One day shortly after my wife and I were married, we set about picking new living-room wallpaper from a book of samples. My taste and hers were at odds.

[3]婚后不久的一天,我和妻子着手从一本样品手册中挑选起居室的壁纸。我们的爱好有了矛盾。

[4]“I like this one,” she said. “That looks like a section of a diseased liver.” “How can you say that? This is a classical pattern that goes all the way back to the Venetian.” “The Venetian were blind. They named blinds after them, remember? I like this one.” “I wouldn’t hang that in hell if I were the devil.”

[4]“我喜欢这一张。” “这张简直就像一块有病的猪肝。” “你怎么能这样说?这可是一幅古典的古威尼斯风格的图案。” “威尼斯人都瞎眼了,后来的瞎子也都是因威尼斯人得名,记得吗?我喜欢这一张。” “我死也不会挂那一张的。”

[5]As the argument went on, my wife suddenly slammed the book shut. “There are over two hundred samples in this book,” she declared. “I say we spend our energy finding one that suits us both, instead of bickering over the ones we don’t like.”

[5]在争吵中,我妻子突然用力把书一合,大声说:“这本书中有200张样品,我们应该把精力用在找到一张我们都喜欢的样品,而不是用来争吵那些我们不喜欢的。”

[6]And that’s how we settled it. Eventually we found a pattern we both liked. The “wallpaper book” became our symbol for settling the myriad issues that arise in marriage. “Well,” she’d say when we couldn’t agree on furniture or a place to vacation, “there are plenty of samples in the wallpaper book.”

[6]我们就这样解决了争执。最后我们终于找到了一个我们共同喜欢的图案。壁纸样品手册成了我们解决婚姻中遇到的无数争执的一个象征。当我们在要什么家具或去什么地方休假的意见不一时,我的妻子就说:“在壁纸样品手册里有的是样品呢!”

7]The issues that people argue over most in marriage, such as how to spend money, often aren’t the real ones. The key issue is: who is going to be in control? When I was younger, my need to control arose out of fear, a lack of trust, insecurity. The day I finally realized I didn’t need to control my wife—that, indeed, I ought not control her, that I couldn’t control her, and that if I tried to, I would destroy our marriage—was the day our marriage began.

[7]人们在婚姻中争吵的那些事情诸如怎样花钱之类,往往并不是争执的真正所在。争执的关键是谁来控制。当我年青的时候,我想去控制是因为出于恐惧,是缺乏信任和安全感。当我终于认识到我不必控制我的妻子的时候,我们的婚姻才算真正开始。确实,我不应该控制我的妻子,我也不能去控制她,如果我要这样去做,我就会毁坏我们的婚姻。

[8]Giving up control is often confused with weakness. But the winner in a domestic argument is never really the winner. When you win a battle and your partner submits, you have, paradoxically, lost.

[8]放弃控制对方常常与软弱相混淆。其实家庭内争吵的赢家永远不可能是真正的赢家。当你赢得了一场口角,使你的另一半屈服了,你其实恰恰相反,是输家了。

[9]What is it we want most from a marriage? To love and be loved. To be happy and secure. To grow, to discover. A love relationship is the garden in which we plant, cultivate and harvest the most precious of crops, our own self, and in which our spouse is provided the same rich soil in which to bloom.

[9]我们在婚姻中最想得到的是什么?是爱与被爱,是幸福与安定,是不断的成长与发现。爱情的关系就是一个花园,在这个花园里我们种植、培养和收获最宝贵的庄稼,这就是我们自己;在这个花园里,我们要给我们的爱人提供同样肥沃的土壤,让她茁壮成长。

[10]We cannot obtain what we want unless our partner also gets what he or she wants. A woman may, for instance, want to go to the symphony. Her husband might hate symphonies. But by spending a few hours listening to music he doesn’t care for, he can bring joy to his partner. That’s a pretty cheap price to pay for joy, isn’t it?

[10]我们不可能得到自己想要的东西,除非我们的配偶得到他(或她)想要的。例如:一个女人想去听一场交响乐,而她的丈夫却讨厌交响乐,只要丈夫宁愿花几个小时去听一下他不喜欢的音乐,就可以给他的配偶带来快乐,难道这不是一个很廉价的换取快乐的办法吗?

[11]But what if a husband wants to go on a fishing trip with friends? Suddenly there aren’t a lot of samples in the wallpaper book: his wife either agrees or not.

[11]但是如果丈夫想要和他的朋友们一起去钓鱼呢?这时妻子就面临同意或不同意的抉择,就像墙纸样手册中突然没有许多样纸可供挑选了。

[12]Already you can hear the usual power strategies: “I’ll spend my money any way I please,” or “How come you’re such a millstone? Jim’s wife is happy that he gets to go.”

[12]你也许已听说过这样的权力策略:“我可以随意花我自己的钱。”或:“你怎么这样麻烦?吉姆的妻子就高兴他随便去哪儿。”

[13]Instead of such strategies, he might try empowering his partner: “Honey, I’d like to go on a fishing trip with the boys. What do you think?” “I thought we were going away.” “How about this fall? I’ve always wanted to take a trip with you to see the fall foliage in New England.” “Good idea. I’ll go see my mother while you’re fishing.” Such a dialogue, as idealistic as it sounds, is born of a marriage of mature adults.

[13]不采用这种办法,丈夫可以把事情让妻子自己决定:“亲爱的,我想和小伙子们一块去钓鱼,你看怎样?” “我想还是我们一块出去吧。” “今年秋天再去怎样?我一直想跟你去新英格兰看一看秋天的落叶。” “好吧。你去钓鱼而我回家看母亲。” 这样的对话,听起来是最理想的了。它只能发生在很成熟的成年人配偶之间。

[14]But what if she says, “You always make promises you never keep. This fall there will be some excuse. I think you owe me a trip first”? Now he must decide. Is she right? She could be, you know. When the couple arrives at this juncture, it’s time for him to listen.

[14]但如果妻子说:“你从不信守诺言。到今年秋天你又会有别的借口。我想是你首先欠我一次出游,对吧?”这样丈夫就必须决定,他的妻子是否正确。要知道,他的妻子可能是正确的。当双方到了这样一个关键时刻,丈夫就应该听从了。

[15]When anger is hurled at us, it hurts us. If it were a pistol, I would insist anger, like control, be checked at the door. But anger can also be a response to pain. So when your spouse responds in anger, you must terminate the argument. It’s that simple: the argument must end because another person may be in pain.

[15]如果激愤在我们之间爆发,它会伤害我们的感情。如果激愤是一把手枪,我认为也要像对待控制他人的欲望一样,要在一开始就不让它发射出来。但是愤怒可以是内心伤痛的一种释放。当你的配偶释放愤怒的时候,你就必须停止争吵。道理很简单,争吵必须终止,因为其中一人可能已被触动内心的痛处。

[16]Try this: Let a little space occur between you. Let the storm recede a little. Then tell your partner you understand that when a person is angry, it means she’s been hurt, and that you want to do something about it because you love her.

[16]不妨这样试一下:让你们之间的紧张松弛一下,让你们之间的风暴平息一点。告诉你的妻子你理解她的激愤,你知道她内心有伤痛,你愿意为此做点什么,因为你爱她。

[17]Perhaps she’ll tell you why she’s hurt—angrily. Try not to be put off, but to hear the anger as sounds of hurt. When you discover the pain, you can address its cause, and the anger will begin to fade.

[17]也许她会愤怒地告诉你她为什么受伤,不要拖延,只管倾听她激愤的表达。当你发现她的痛处是什么时,你可以说出它的原因,这样激愤就可以平抚。

[18]You’re allowed to get angry too. But dumping anger on your partner is a poor way to soothe your hurt. When you talk of your hurt without anger, an unangry response usually comes.

[18]你自己也可以表示愤怒,但是对你的配偶宣泄你的激愤不是一个抚平内心伤痛的好办法。你如心平气和地说出你的隐伤,你会得到心平气和的理解。

[19] So remember: If you want to overcome anger in your relationship, search for the hurt. If you want to feel loved and respected, give up control. And if you want to win arguments at home, learn to lose them.

[19]所以请记住:如果你要想在你们的关系中克服激愤,那么就要找出内心的伤痛;如果你要想得到爱和尊重,就必须放弃对伴侣的控制;如果你想要赢得家中的口角,就先学会认输吧!

篇5:学会倾听双语美文

学会倾听双语美文

A person has two ears but only one mouth.

一个人有两只耳朵,但只有一张嘴巴。

That's because we are meant to listen, not to just speak.

这是因为我们天生就是要去倾听的,而不光是去说。

People talk too much. Everybody wants others to listen to them but forget to listen to others.

人们讲的话实在太多了。每个人都希望别人听他们讲,却忘了去倾听别人。

That's why we are not really communicating as much as we think we are.

这就是为什么我们的交流实际上没有我们以为的那么多。

I used to wonder why nobody pay any attention to what I say.

我以前一直不解,为什么没有人在乎我讲了什么。

There are things that I want to express.

我有自己想要表达的东西。

There are feelings that I want others to know that I have.

我有自己的情愫,而且我想让别人知道。

The fact that nobody actually listen to me really made me feel sad.

然而没有人真的在听我说,这真的让我很伤心。

But latter I found out that I had been doing exactly the same thing.

但后来,我发现我自己其实在做一样的事情。

I kept talking never really listened to anybody.

我一直在说话,但却没有倾听过任何人。

So I tried to make myself a listener.

于是,我试着让自己变成一个倾听者。

And I gradually found out how ignorant I had been towards the people that I know.

然后我才逐渐发现,我对身边这些人真的知之甚少。

Now I've listened to them. I've known what they actually said. I've known why they said them. And I've become a better person myself.

现在,我倾听过他们了。我知道了他们都讲了什么。我也理解了他们为什么要说这些。而我,也变成了更好的自己。

Change. Be a listener. And the world will change for you in return.

所以,改变吧。做个倾听者。你会发现,这个世界倒头来也会为你而改变。

扩展:潜水常用词

buoyancy compensation device(BCD) 浮力补偿背心

wet suit 潜水湿衣

spear gun 鱼枪

fins 蛙鞋

mask 面镜

compass 罗盘

weight belt 配重带

snorkel 呼吸管

outboard motor 舷外发动机

gauge 潜水计量器

regulator 调节器

mouth piece 吸嘴

tropical fish 热带鱼

air tank 空气桶

underwater camera 水下摄像机

coral 珊瑚

booties 潜水靴

boat 船

glove 潜水手套

flashlight 手电筒

篇6:爱要怎么说出口双语美文

爱要怎么说出口双语美文

If only we’d never gone there, thought Alan. They were scrambling up the mountainside in the late afternoon heat. Alice was so tanned that she looked as if she had lived on the Mediterranean for months, while he, being fair, had turned a blotchy, peeling.

阿兰心里想道:要是我们从未到过那个地方该多好啊。在下午后半晌的炎热中,他们向山坡上爬去。爱丽丝被晒得黑黝黝的,看上去就像在地中海上住过几个月似的;而阿兰原本细皮嫩肉,这时身上已经变得红一块白一块,脱了一层皮。

He looked up at the mountainside, the path twisting upwards towards the cairn cross, the white heat bleaching the rock. Why on earth couldn’t they talk about it? Why couldn’t he even accuse her?

他抬头向山坡望去,只见小路盘旋而上通向那个圆锥形十字石碑,炽热的阳光将岩石晒得发白。他们究竟为什么不能谈那件事?他为什么连责骂她都不能呢?

He had thought it was going to be all right. But it was as if the heat had drained their love.

他原以为一切都会好的,但好像酷热已经将他们的爱抽干。

At home they had been so blissfully happy that he now realized it couldn’t have lasted. She comes to his school from the Midlands because her family had split up. An only child, living with her father, trying to look after him, lonely, depressed, anxious, she had come to Alan to be healed. At least, that’s what he liked to think. Had he healed her? No. Tom had, even though Alan loved her with all the passion. Now his hatred for both of them was as strong as his love.

在家时,他们曾是多么幸福。现在他意识到那不会再继续下去了。由于家庭破裂,她从内陆来到他的学校。作为独生女,她和她的父亲住在一起,尽力去照顾他。她孤独无依、无精打采、愁眉苦脸,经常到阿兰那里去排除忧伤。至少他喜欢这样认为。他为她解忧了吗?没有。是汤姆,即使阿兰曾付出所有的激情爱着她。如今他对他们俩的爱就像他的恨一样强烈。 “Come on!”Alice had turned back to him, waving impatiently.

“跟上!”爱丽丝转身向他喊,不耐烦地挥着手。

“Coming,”Alan looked at his watch. Five, The crickets would start singing soon. He walked on, the sweat pouring into his eyes. Knowing she had opened the bottle of mineral water. Would she let him catch up with her? An even greater misery seized him. It reminded him of the night he made himself drunk on the rough local wine his parents bought in the village. His heart had ached then, too, and his sense of loss had increased as he relived each minute of a day when Tom and Alice had seemed to draw closer and closer together.

“来了。”阿兰看了看手表。已经5点了。蛐蛐儿马上就要开始鸣唱了。他继续向上走,汗水源源不断地流到了眼里。他知道她已经打开那瓶矿泉水。她会让他跟上她吗?一种更大的痛苦折磨着他。这使他想起那天晚上他用父母亲从村里买的粗制的当地酒将自己灌醉的情景,那时他的心也在发痛。每当他想起爱丽丝和汤姆越来越亲近的时候,他的失落感就会与日俱增。

He walked faster. Here, a few miles away on the bare mountainside, there was arid space, and the olive groves, clustered in the stone-cluttered valleys below.

他走得越来越快。他为山顶上那些中世纪的城堡而欢呼雀跃。放眼望去,离那座山几里远的地方有一块空地,在山谷的乱石丛中生长着一小片橄榄林。 “Come on!”

“跟上!”

“Coming.”

“来了。”

Alan strode doggedly on, looking down at his red, peeling legs, thinking of Tom’s strong, straight, brown ones.

阿兰仍顽强地大步前行,他低头看了一眼自己被晒红的、脱了皮的两腿,想起了汤姆强健挺拔的棕色的双腿。

Suddenly he had turned the corner by the stone shelter. He could see her waiting for him. If Tom were here, they would be together, mocking him, looking at each other, leaving him alone. As he strode self-consciously on Alan focused his mind on her.

突然,他拐到石头后面一块隐蔽的地方。他看到她正在等他。如果汤姆也在这里的话,他们一定会站在一起嘲笑他,相互凝望着,把他丢在一边。当他拘谨地向前走的时候,他将注意力都集中在她的身上。

“Where’re we going to camp?”She was sitting on an outcrop, her slim body supple and salt-caked. Her legs were swinging and he longed to run his hands over them. Instead he imagined Tom doing that and hot, angry tears filled his eyes.

“我们到哪里去宿营?”她坐在一块突出的岩石上。她的苗条的身材丰满,咸咸的。她的腿在那里晃来晃去。他真想将自己的手在那上面滑动。而他却想象着汤姆那样做的情景。顿时,愤怒的泪水充满了他的眼睛。

“Santa Caterina.”

“圣卡塔林纳。”

“What’s that?”

“那是什么?”

“It’s a deserted monastery, down in the valley. Amongst the fir trees. Over there—look, you can see it.”

“是一座破庙,在山谷下面,杉树丛中。在那里——看,你可以看到的。”

“Oh yes.”She turned her head. When he did look he was shocked to see how beautiful she was, like a goddess.

“噢,是的。”她转过头。当他真正拿眼去看她的时候,她看上去是那样美,像一尊女神。

“Won’t that be spooky?”she asked in the slightly broken voice that he had always found so sexy.

“那不可怕吧?”她用略微沙哑的声音说。他发现她的嗓音竟是那样性感。

God, how he loved her. Why couldn’t he just take her in his arms now? That could solve everything. But there seemed to be an impenetrable barrier around her—as if she was sealed away by Tom.

上帝啊,他是多么爱她,现在他为什么不可以把她揽在怀里呢?这样,一切问题都会迎刃而解的。但是,好像她周围有一种难以逾越的障碍——就像被汤姆密封了起来。

“The valley’s dangerous,”said Alan, hoping to frighten her, to provoke reaction.“If the clouds come down there’s no way out. Sometimes for days.”

“这个山谷很危险,”阿兰说,希望吓住她,引起她一种反应。“如果乌云压下来就会无路可走了。有时会持续好几天。”

“Is there anywhere else to camp,”asked Alice.

“还有其它地方可以宿营吗?”爱丽丝问道。

“Not really.”Alan was certain she’d rather be with Tom. Yesterday he had seen them sitting on a wall together outside the villa. Their ankles had been entwined. He had wanted to grab Tom’s legs and pull him off. He would hurt his brother—and Alice would be sorry . It would be her fault.

“说不准,”阿兰敢肯定她一定会宁愿和汤姆在一起。昨天他曾见他们一起坐在别墅外的一堵墙上,他们的脚踝曾缠绕在一起,他曾想拽着汤姆的腿把他拉下来。他会伤害自己的弟弟。爱丽斯会感到内疚。那是她的过错。

“Let’s go,”said Alan quickly.

“我们走吧,”阿兰飞快地说。

“How far is it?”she asked.“I’m whacked.”

“还有多远?”她问,“我一点劲儿也没有了。”

“Half an hour.”

“半小时。”

“Can we eat them?”Her voice was a little plaintive. Alan noticed with satisfaction that she was becoming dependent on him again. But he knew that once they were off the mountain she would be with Tom. For a crazy moment he imagined Alice with himself living in the mountain valley together. Always. Trapped perhaps by some magical force that wouldn’t let them leave.

“我们能吃点东西吗?”她的声音有点儿伤感。阿兰心满意足,注意到她正在再次依靠他。但他知道一旦他们离开这座大山,她就会和汤姆泡在一起。一时间,他竟荒.唐地想象着爱丽丝和自己一起居住在这个山谷,直到永远。或许是被某种魔力困在这里,不让他们离开。

The monastery was square-roofed, austere,with barrack windows. There were fish tanks at the back and a terrace on which the monks would have walked.

那座庙是方顶、木窗,十分简朴。庙后面有一些鱼缸,还有一个平台,和尚可以在上面随意走动。

Their feet on the stones made the only sound. Santa Caterina was utterly still. A swift rose soundlessly over the slate roof and the heat shimmered on the roughcast walls. They lay down, their rucksack still on their backs, passing the water bottle, almost dozing.

四周只有他们踏在石头上所发出的声响,圣卡塔林纳万籁俱寂。一朵怒放的玫瑰在石板屋顶无声无息,亮光在粗糙的墙壁上闪烁。他们躺下来,递过水瓶,旅行包仍背在背后。他们几乎昏昏欲睡。

Suddenly she sat up and looked him with surprising tenderness. Alan’s black mood eased slightly.

突然,她坐起来,用令人吃惊的温柔目光凝视着他。阿兰的难受情绪稍微得到了缓解。

Have they all gone then?”asked Alice.

“他们都已经走了吗?”爱丽丝问道。

“Yes. I don’t know when. A long time ago.”

“是的。我不知道是什么时候走的。好长时间了吧。”

She was lying back, her eyes closed. He could talk to her now. They could both talk the problem and solve it. They would reach each other. But he couldn’t make the move.

她仰面躺着,双目紧闭。他现在可以和她谈了。他们俩谈谈那个问题,然后就迎刃而解了。他们彼此都能探到对方,但他不能动。

“It would be terrible if it is pulled down,”Alice said idly, her eyes still closed.

“如果庙被推倒,那将是多么可怕,”爱丽丝懒懒地说,眼睛仍然闭着。

“It won’t be.”

“不会的。”

“How do you know that?”

“你怎么知道?”

“They patch it up from time to time.”

“他们总是不断地修缮它。”

“Why don’t they live here?”

“他们为什么不住在这里呢?”

“Don’t know. Maybe it’s too remote.”

“不知道,或许这里太偏远了吧。”

The desire to punish her had gone. But he daren’t touch her. He daren’t break the enchantment.

渐渐地,想惩罚她的欲望消失了,但他不敢触摸她,不敢轻易打破这令人着迷的时刻。

“The heat in the day. The cool evenings. It would be good to live like that.”

“白天热,夜里凉。住在这种地方会很不错的。”

“Live here?”

“住在这里?”

“Could we ever get permission?”

“我们会被允许吗?”

“I don’t know.”

“我不知道。”

“Just to see what it was like. I mean—”She half sat up.“Can we get inside?”She ran a finger gently down his peeling cheek.

“先看看这里怎么样,我是说——” 她半坐了起来。“我们能进去吗?”她将一根手指轻轻地放在他脱皮的脸颊上。

Alan was taken aback but then he became aware that the crickets had started. How long had they been singing? He wondered.“Let go and see.”

他吃了一惊,随后意识到蛐蛐儿的鸣叫声已经响起。他不知道它们已经鸣唱了多长时间。“让我们去看看吧。”

They tramped round but as Alan already knew, there was no way in. In the end they came back and he lit a fire at the side of a small stone building. Other campers had obviously used the space and there were black marks on the walls.

他们绕过去,但正如阿兰早就知道的那样,无路可进。最后,他们又原路返回,在一座小型石头建筑旁生了一堆火。显然,其他野营的人也曾使用过这个地方,墙壁上还留有黑色的痕迹。

He cooked supper, using half a precious bottle of water to make it. The intimacy was still there but the talking was at an end. Alan could hardly contain his rising excitement. They had night together. Anything could happen.

他晚饭用去了半瓶珍贵的水,亲密关系依旧存在,但他们已经无话可说。阿兰几乎难以按捺那正在膨胀的冲动。他们一起拥有这个夜晚,任何事情都可能会发生。

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